Marathon Man

pky
(didnt get to post this in time, should have been posted Monday 2006.07.10)

So I saw innings 9-19 yesterday. nothing as great as wasting a beautiful sunday afternoon with plans in place because you're watching an abysmal red sox team with the heart of the order going 2-32. ortiz was 1-7, nixon 0-10, manny 1-whatever, varitek 0-8, etc, etc, etc. it was awful to watch. then to see two chances to get outs and close the game out when the white sox demonstrated their inability to run the bases, and then to watch the moron umps miss the perennial bitch in pierzynski shove his hands up A-Gon's thigh to break apart a double play, which should have been called two outs regardsless to end the inning AND THE GAME, 5-4. instead, no call, 2 outs instead, and another billion innings left to go. what a freaking waste.

i didnt realize the all star game was this week. is there anything as irrelevant as this thing? hardly. but at least it "counts." cant wait for joe morgan and chris berman break down the plays. "back back back back back back back back." thanks for the good times and insight berman. you dick. joe morgan, you're next, but i'll just leave it up to these guys at firejoemorgan.blogspot.com. dickhead. i cant stand ESPN. their push for the world cup was hilarious. honestly, other than the italianos in the north end yesterday, who gives two shiz? it's great that it's a tournament, it's great that teams from around teh world get together to compete. the greatness of the worldcup isnt the soccer, it's a function of the competition. it's what makes the olympics great. you root for your country's supremacy over other countries. it's too bad that they're playing soccer though. but i guess that's an american centric perspective- there's no way that american football would work, and basketball is a joke in general... we saw the futility of the "world baseball classic." is it a classic if it's never happened before? or what if it happens and it sucks? hard to say. no, not really. the world baseball classic was a COLOSSAL, TITANIC misnomer. looks like it has to be soccer for the universal sport. too bad... cause it really is so boring. the excitement comes from the fact that you know there wont be a game tomorrow, or the weekend after. but i have to admit, the quality of play from countries not named USA is so much better. that said, the only reason i'd ever watch is to see how far the USA goes. call it ironic, call it a catch 22. whatever.

we're now entering dangerous territory- the MLB all star break , where pre 2003 the red sox would either wilt into Oblivia, or post 2003 the red sox beat their opponents into submission. the problem however is that the yankees also have their annual "Juice Surge." Giambi's been enjoying his juice surge all year, and sheffield hurt himself injecting HGH into his penal hole. what a fraud. yeah, i know, the yankees suck. they sucked ass last year too, but they ended up juicing their way to win the pennant again. it's sad that the sox had like a 10 game lead and still couldnt make it happen. it is. it's pathetic. that said, there is absolutely no doubt that the team this year is head and shoulders better than last year, even though record wise, they're only a few games ahead. while the results are mildly better, the only measure that counts is the "when do you hold your breath?" factor. with renteria out, I no longer hold my breath when the ball's hit to the left side of the field. A-Gon's saved like 40 runs this year with his spectacular play. the same goes for lowell and arguably youkilis at times. compare that to the 40 runs created by renteria last year for the opponent. there's no more holding the breath when our closer comes in either. huge.

which takes me to my next point. craig hansen better get his act together, which he's been slowly doing more and more consistently. he is the future closer of the club. papelbon needs to throw more innings. if the sox can get 5 solid starters, it's over. plain and simple. this jason johnson clown act isnt going to hold. the dude's a freaking joke. he's probably as bad as clement. never seen a dude have less control of his pitches, and fiddle and nibble more aroudn teh plate. except for clement. if papelbon becomes a starter next year, and hansen steps into the closer's role, things will be sweet. really sweet. none of this can happen this year though. you dont mess with success. but in the offseason, you start to make it happen. once you do that, you get rid of the waste that is matt clement. you have beckett, papelbon, lester, wakefield, and then you have to find one more guy to find. i'm sure there will be some second rate FA we could pick up in the offseason for a 5th starter. point being that papelbon being a starter solves a LOT of damn problems. the bullpen would be decent with delcarmen assuming he continues to develop consistency, and with tavarez doing his usual thing- which is completely unpredictable. why was he signed for 2 years? whatever. maybe timlin can sign for a one year deal, and have hansen be the closer. we'd still need about 2 more bullpen guys, but as usual, pitching is short in the major league, so having 4 solid starters will put you head and shoulders ahead of a lot of other teams. stick in some vets for the last two, three bullpen slots, and you'll be looking at another great year. i'm getting ahead of myself though.

after listening to yesterday's baseball show in the morning, i've decided that mike adams is a complete moron. some might say that i'm a little late to the party on that one, but he truly is a moron. i dont think he knows anything about sports. he was saying that in 01, 02 whenever that joke of an allstar game that ended in a tie was, torre and brenly should have taken outfielders in to throw pitches. as if the all star game wasnt irrelevant enough, he wants to make it a complete joke. dont mis-take that to think that i'm defending selig- the man's a stupid moron the likes of which rival a kennedy... but what the hell do you expect? the managers manage the game as if it doesnt count because it doesnt, and if it ends in a tie, it sucks, but who cares. bringing in an outfielder to throw a pitch would be the dumbest thing ever. so after sean adams tells mike adams this, mike goes, "well ok, then teh last pitcher should just pitch it out then." hey dumbass. stfu. if the last pitcher is jon papelbon, would you still be saying the same thing? you want papelbon tossing 5 innings because you want some resolution to a nebulous ass all star game? give me a break. honestly adams, just quit. how does he even get up in the morning? why does he even get up? just QUIT. and i cant stand the way he talks. the man's a freaking dumbass. hopefully espn hires him soon to join joe morgan. MIKE ADAMS, JUST JOIN YOUR BRETHREN AT ESPN.

i know that i'm jumping on the bandwagon here, but liriano really should be on the all star team. figure it out on your own- his numbers are indomitable. buerhle, please. PLEASE. call that the ozzie guillen discrimination factor. fag.

i know this is late, but guillen was SPOT ON when he called jay mariotti a fag. SPOT THE HELL ON. i couldnt have said it better myself. and he handled it perfectly. i'm not guillen fan, but when he does stuff like that and he's actually right, i just love it. he's like a liberal venezuelan crazy minded ann coulter. he goes off 95% of the time, and usually he's just crazy, but there's that 1% when he gets it right. this was that 1%.

UFC 61 tonight. i didnt PPV it obviously because i dont believe in paying for events like that unless i'm actually going to see it live, but i just got it and i cant wait. was watching the pre fight interviews and hype all month anticipating this. TUF 3 was a great season. never seen a guy as moronic and stupid as Shamrock. watching his guys train in the backyard and getting hammered by all of Ortiz's guys was so gratifying. cant beat it. TUF 4 cant come soon enough. as i was telling EP last night, i'm gonna get Tapout 2 for xbox and run a sim. like i was also discussing with ep, i'm worried that ortiz is too caught up in the "i'm going to retire shamrock" angle, and will sacrifice the win just to do more damage to ken's face. while that would be nice, the win is more important.

never realized that tim "the Maine-iac" sylvia was from Maine. i've never seen his nickname spelled out. it's nice that New England's got a good fighter in the UFC. better than the bitches from new york and california, (ortiz not included).

iverson to the celtics, or KG? my vote would be for KG. i cant really break it down though for you- i'm too lukewarm a fan to really have any valuable insight. i look to change that next year. i default to ep's brother, lp. lp will know what's best. from here on, we will refer to LP as the rightful GM of the celtics. he's honestly one of two diehard celtics fans I know of. the other being DL, who i think we've lost as a reader. sad. not enough celtics talk =)

what the hell is with branch holding out? he's a good receiver, but he hardly has the clout that seymour carries. how about show the hell up at camp deion and establish yourself as the #1 receiver, and make bank next year?

being named to the NL all star team is like... being named to the Little League all star team.

federer was absolutely amazing in Wimbledon. his domination is sick. it's also impressive to see nadal do that well on grass. i didnt think he would get that far. it's too bad agassi didnt win it, or at least last longer. best wishes agassi- enjoy your retirement. i still dont really get the steffi graf thing... tennis players get their pick of the litter. but whatever.