"...a bitch is a bitch is a bitch..."

pky
rule 1, section 1 (1.1) in the pky universe handbook: beware the bitch at heart- a bitch is a bitch is a bitch is a bitch.

by rule 1, section 1 (1.1) in the pky universe handbook, we here at trophyvilleusa do not acknowledge the recently awarded AL Comeback Player of the Year, Jason Giambi.

by corollary 1 of rule 1, all who are given spurious awards are deemed, bitches; therefore, by rule 1 and its corollary, a bitch is a bitch is a bitch..is a jason giambi.

as a corollary to my previous post about EA's ineptitude, here's my prediction of the century: Madden 2006 on XBOX 360 will look IDENTICAL to Madden 2006 on xbox. and they'll attribute the failure to its being a first gen 360 game. while sega's tearing it up with nba 2k6 on 360 and making it look even better than real life, EA's going to be porting Madden 2001 over to the 360, and to convince the EA fagboys, no, i mean fanboys that it's worth buying, they will SHINE IT UP real nice, to look just like real life. consider this. madden 2006 = madden 2005 = 2004 = 2003 = 2002 = 2001. go play them. notice how you slide around. notice how all the qbs look the same. notice how the lighting sucks in each previous iteration. notice how nice and shiny the newer iterations are. EA, eat my chien ming wang.

someone explain to me why the game's on at 4.

question of my lifetime: how many more championships would the celtics have won, if len bias didnt die and if reggie lewis didnt die. watching reggie lewis collapse that night in the garden (or was it fleetcenter already? i dont think so... but i could be wrong) gave me chills. absolutely ridiculous too.

boston.com needs to have an archive of all the greatest sports moments wallpaper-ified. I'm talking EVERYTHING.

meterparel made a good point this morning. he thinks the devil rays are gonna be a decent team, soon, if not next year. they'll have a new manager, new gm, and if they're lucky, a new owner. their talent pool is strong, and once they get some better pitching, they may be good enough to contend. or at least do better than the Os and Jays. and one of these years, better than the yankees. those stupid, ugly yankees. i'm looking right at you RJ. Matsui makes an honorable mention.

a poignant question.
why cant we have players like tadahito iguchi?
your answer:

i'm not conceding this year, because i think the red sox are forcing a game 5. wake and schill will get through the weekend. but i want to talk abotu next year. think about what next year is going to look like. we're going to be phasing out more than half of the team. actually that's inaccurate. it might be more accurate to say that we're phasing out less than the entire team. consider this: a new first baseman, a new second baseman (or preferably, stick with graffanino), a new third baseman (or stick with youk... but i like mueller), a new left fielder, a new center fielder, and if we're lucky, a new right fielder. a new starter in papelbon, maybe lester a few new relievers in hansen and delcarmen, or maybe lester in the bullpen instead. i didnt really follow jacoby ellsbury after we drafted him, but they're saying he has the makeup of a johnny damon. his A numbers are nothing special as of yet obviously. he wont be here next year for sure. will they bring up pedroia? eh. kelly shoppach + nixon needs to be traded for a few everyday players somehow. nixon's too fragile, and he hasnt been producing. i like him, but lets trade him while he has value. same for bill mueller. both guys i like and respect a lot. but they're aging, so we need to get something back from them.

i dont see damon coming back. he'd turn down 4 years, 40 million. there's no way he's getting more than that from the sox. and he certainly wouldnt have taken the hometown discount. 4 years is 1,2 years too many. the obvious problem is, who do you leadoff with then? damon established himself the past few years, this year especially as a premiere leadoff batter. if we dont resign him, who do we put in his place? i have no idea.

konerko has been crying abotu how he doesnt want to come east. fine. who do we replace manny with? damn i have no idea. if i had to choose between millar or olerud, i wont waste your time with that answer. but is olerud going to be exposed if he plays everyday? i think it'd be wise to go with a true everyday 1B. olerud would be a great backup though.

IDEALLY, we'd replace E6 with hanley, but i dont see him as ready to come up either. but i could live with hanley coming up if that means that we trade E6 somehow for virtually anyone else. i cant stand him. i think he's awful, i dont care how good the NL thinks he is, because we've seen what this guy can do. and it's nothing to be impressed with. yeah, i think he'll have a better second year, only because only a little leaguer would have had a worse year than he did this year. once you hit rock bottom, it's pretty tough to go deeper. although, if anyone can find a way, E6 can.

i think i'd prefer to keep manny, but he pisses me off. and no matter how many runs he produces, he still allows more runs for the other team than anyone player should be allowed to score. except for E6. E6 takes that cake over manny, but manny's creeping.

i'm too exhausted to talk about the rest of the team for next year. lets get back to this year.
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and onto the pats. if they stop atl's run, the vaunted and gay ron-mexicoesque "DVD" attack, vick is done. unless matt schaub comes in, in which case the pats will actually have to defend against the pass.

and about michael vick, dale arnold beat down the michael vick lover in boston. Coldhardfootballfacts.com has it detailed here in their mailbag

[excerpt]
“Regarding your Cold, Hard Football Facts on Michael Vick and his TDs, and putting things in perspective, New England quarterback Steve Grogan ran for 12 TDs in 1976 (a 14-game season), trailing only running backs Franco Harris (14), Walter Payton (13) and Chuck Foreman (13) that year.”
- Tim Freitas

CHFF: That certainly puts things in perspective. After all, the almighty Vick (who is certainly a tremendous athlete) rushed for just three (count ‘em, 3) TDs in 15 games in 2004 and passed for just 2,313 yards – fewer than great Tennessee backup Billy Volek passed for in just eight games last season. He also has just 14 rushing TDs in his career – just two more than Grogan had in 1976 alone.

We’re hoping the truth about Vick’s production (or lack thereof) will sooner or later see the light of day. It’s a tough fight though in a world of pigskin “analysis” dominated by opinionated hacks who wouldn’t know a f’in Cold, Hard Football Fact if it bent them over a crack house couch and shoved a tennis ball in their mouth to muffle their screams. Actually, some of the “pundits” are on our bandwagon. Dale Arnold of Boston sports radio WEEI (850 AM) in Boston recently used the Cold, Hard Football Facts to beat down a caller who thinks Vick is the second coming of Red Grange. (It’s nice to know some of the “pundits” get it.) But, as you pointed out, he’s not even the second coming of Steve Grogan.
[/excerpt]

hmm. billy volek. wow. that's impressive. is there any doubt that the patriots will win sunday? no.

for the people who havent read it yet, go to www.coldhardfootballfacts.com and educate yourselves. i dont even go to shitSPN and cbs anymore except to check scores. the shitSPN boycott is still alive and well.