Kobe writes for Dime Magazine

Kobe Bryant ... in his own words

Dime Magazine
Posted: 7 hours ago

The following excerpt is from Kobe Bryant's first-person cover story in Issue #22 of Dime.

The latest issue of Dime, available at newstands now.

My biggest fear is not winning another title. But fear is a
great motivator. I'm determined to lead this organization back to the
top. The people who once celebrated me are the same people who doubt me
now. They say that because I don't have Shaq that I can't win, that
it's over. The only thing I truly worry about is that my drive and my
will are sometimes too much for my teammates to handle. Do I expect too
much from them? How can I elevate them to play with my same passion
every night?

What helps me understand and deal with this is the
fact that I was once in their shoes. I once played a supporting role on
this team. Back then I knew how much pressure Shaquille had on him to
win a ring and I also knew I could help. So I studied the game
offensively and especially defensively because I knew that if I could
harass on the perimeter with him clogging the lane, it would demoralize
our opponents more than anything we could do offensively.

I also
knew that the teams he played on in the past did not have a closer. No
one could take the game over down the stretch or hit the game winner or
make the key free throws. Those were Shaq's weaknesses, so I had to
step up and make them my strengths. I knew how much more I could bring
to the battle, but that wasn't my role. I was a scorer who became a
facilitator in order to win.

But now I worry because I know how
hard that was for me to learn, how many sleepless nights I had and how
much criticism and trade rumors I had to endure before I mastered my
role. This is probably what my current teammates are going through. All
I can do is pray that one day we will reach the same level of chemistry
and understanding that existed between me, Shaq, Rick Fox, Derek
Fisher, Robert Horry and all the other players I once went to war with.

The
fears I have are soothed a little by the presence of Phil Jackson.
Simply put: He is the best coach I have ever played for. Everything I
have learned about the game can be traced to him and Tex Winter. They
teach the game at such a deeper level than X's and O's. The game is a
rhythm, a dance. Phil and Tex have taught me to feel the game.
To think the game without thinking, to see without seeing. They taught
me how to prepare. How to conceptualize the spirit of my opponents and
attack them where they are weak.

"I take it to the other team on both ends of the floor. I take pride in being able to do that. I HATE being scored on, even by players who some say are 'un-guardable.'"

I've seen how prepared PJ gets before games, and as the on-court
leader he is trusting me to do the same. So I do all the things he has
taught me to do before tipoff and once the ball is in the air my mind
is at ease and my body is ready to play. I take it to the other team on
both ends of the floor. I take pride in being able to do that. I HATE
being scored on, even by players who some say are "un-guardable." I
don't believe it when they say "Oh, that player is just hot today."
F--- that! Cool his ass off then.

When we play on the road and
the entire crowd is booing me it doesn't bother me at all. What I think
about is simple: "When these fans leave this game I want them to
remember how hard I fought and the passion and drive with which I
played." I have always played this game with passion. And I always
worked hard.

When I saw the movie Rudy I remember
thinking, "What if I worked that hard?" God has blessed me both
physically and intellectually to play this game, so what would happen
if I push as hard as the character in this film? I would love for
people to think of me as a talented overachiever. Even though those
fans may chant "Kobe sucks" when they leave that arena I want them to
walk out with a different feeling than they came in with. When they
leave they'll leave with the understanding that they have just
witnessed a player give himself completely to his passion; they have
just watched an athlete pour every ounce of his heart and soul out on
that floor.

And hopefully, when the next volume of my life is all
said and done, they will respect and appreciate the years that I spent
giving all of me to the game that means everything to me.